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Ok, so now we are in the VIP area and the Champagne is flowing. Tabitha and Brittny have become permanent fixtures at our table, and we are having the times of our lives. One would think you don't tempt fate.....but you don't know Vern Vern - Hey, let's play a game Afro - Oh shit... Tab & Brit - Sure..... Afro - Whoa whoa whoa......what game Vern ?? Vern - Stripper Jeopardy Afro - Huh ? Tab & Brit - Ok, how do we play ? Vern - Well, just like the regular game on TV. We ask you a series of questions and for each right answer we give you a dollar. Sense there are two of you, Raleigh and I will give each of you a two dollars We started them off with $20 in the pot and began round one of the questions - Vern - What is the Capitol of Texas ? T&B - Colorado Afro - WHAT ?? Vern - Close enough...cha ching ! Vern - Where is the Alamo? T&B - Ft. Worth Afro - WHAT ?? Vern - Close enough...cha ching ! Vern - Where was JFK shot? T&B - In the head ..... Afro - WHAT ?? Vern - Close enough...cha ching ! Vern - How many stars are on the US flag T&B - 52 Afro - WHAT ?? T&B - Yeah, Alaska & Hawaii Vern - Close enough...cha ching ! Vern - What is the Capitol of Texas ? T&B - Colorado Afro - WHAT ?? Vern - Close enough...cha ching ! Vern - Name a car NOT made in the US or Japan ? T&B - Neon Afro - As in Dodge Neon ? T&B - Uh huh... Vern & Afro - Close enough...cha ching ! Vern - Name (3) American Indian tribes... T&B - Cherokee....Apache.......um, um.... Afro - Here's a hint....what do Lawyers help you do ? T&B - Prosecute... Vern & Afro - Close enough...cha ching ! By this time, tears were streaming down my face. The manager stopped by a few times to check on us and even supplied a question or two. See, I had heard of Country Dumb but had never witnessed this phenomena in person. Vern asked a several more questions with the same miserable answers and the pot had grown to about $60 bucks. We had killed both bottles of Champagne, countless Lemon Drop shots and it was getting close to closing time. That's when Vern made his move. Vern - Ok, last question....double or nothing. You get it right, and we double what's on the table. Get it wrong, you give us the equivalent amount in lap dances. Afro - What the hell are you doin? Vern - Shh...just follow my lead Afro - I have been all night....but now we are on the $120 path Vern - Trust me... T&B - Ok...but no trick questions Vern - Deal.....and because you guy's are in college majoring in politics , I will ask you a political question. T&B - Ok Vern - Name 17 US Presidents T&B - Bush, Bush,Clinton, Reagan,Carter, Ford, Kennedy, Nixon, Washington, Lincoln, Jackson, Carter Vern - Sorry, you have already said Carter T&B - Oh, Johnson, Roosevelt, Roosevelt.......umm....ummm....fuck it, you like this song ? Vern - Nah, let's wait for the next. The ladies danced the next three songs while their mother closed out our tab. Dave, the manager told Vern not to worry about the membership and that we were welcome anytime...just ask for him at the door. Guess he figured we had spent enough that night. Turnns out he is a cigar guy so I gifted him two Monte #4's to say thanks. He bought us one last round of lemon drops...like I needed any more to drink and we headed out. We got into the truck and we turned to one another - Afro - Yo, do you just make this shit up as you go along ? Vern - Nope, been plannin' this all week !
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Bravo PadronMan
