3.  What's the point, really, of something which doesn't provide    any support? You poor deluded leatherman!  The point of panty hose is not support! The point is to hide your legs in sweaty hot stuff because it would be scandalous to show bare legs in public.  That and to look like you have a tan and keep from causing traffic accidents when the light shines off your glaringly white legs as you walk down the street. Support hose came along after the fact to help women who have varicose veins and then control tops came along for those who figured they might as well look thinner if they were going to stuff themselves into hot sweaty nylon. I hate panty hose with so much passion that it's all over you screen, but I am not going to spray anything onto my legs.  I'm old enough that I don't give a rat's ass if my mom thinks I'm unladylike or the world thinks I'm not tan enough.  I would think even women who cared would prefer the self-tanning stuff to spray on hose, but what do I know?  I don't even wear make-up more than about twice a year and I live in Southern California but I haven't had a single plastic surgery.

I hate panty hose with so much passion that it's all over you screen,                                           ^^^^ YAY!  The meme was SAVED! Well, almost.  I believe that it's ...that it is all over...  I'd know for sure if rone hadn't bruised my brain when he beat the that into it.

Observations: 1.  Is Stanislaw Lem still alive and in possession of enough of his     faculties to see his wet dream come true? Lem is a wet dream. 41. Is spray-on pantyhose as effective as Glad Wrap and a rubber band?

6.  What would happen if Ron Howard thought he was reaching for     a can of spray-on hair and accidentally used a can of spray-on     fleshtone pantyhose on his head?  Would he have to become a     bank robber, or would he just become Clint Howard and drink     himself silly with a big bottle of tranya? I can't find spray-on hair on www.ronco.com.  Anyone know why it's been discontinued?

   2.  I've heard that during World War II, dames would draw a line up        the back of their leg with an eyebrow pencil so they could pretend        they were wearing seamed stockings, due to a shortage of nylon        what with all those selfish airmen wanting to have parachutes.        So what part of the current war effort has led to this new        form of imitation hosiery?  They need sexy stockings to dress up prisoners in. As I once said, the main result of all the scandalous attention given to the brutality at Abu Ghraib will be that the Army will redesign its sandbags. So, what you're saying is that from now on they're going to just make their prisoners wear stocking masks?  Hmm.  Do they even make reasonably opaque nylons? Also, why don't bank robbers wear stocking masks any more?  I realize nobody wears three-hole ski masks any more because there aren't many places you can buy them, but is there a reason bank robbers no longer wear pantyhose over their heads other than the fact that it does nothing to disguise them and The Nude Bomb was a major flop?                                            

I hate panty hose with so much passion that it's all over you screen,                                           ^^^^ YAY!  The meme was SAVED! But can it resurrect TriBizz?